Mysterious love stories: Confessing love
When I met Du Qian, I was still a young, reckless student in school, with the sensitivity and sorrow of youth just beginning to bloom.
During the summer vacation of my sophomore year, I found a well-paying job at a summer camp organized by a foreign language training center, responsible for teaching English to ten children.
One Saturday evening, we had a meeting to summarize our progress. I lost track of time while making teaching cards and rushed into the office about ten minutes late, like an out-of-control train. A young man was speaking, and suddenly, more than a dozen pairs of astonished eyes turned towards me. Blushing, I quickly found a seat, and he stopped to smile at me gently, saying, “Please sit down.”
And so, I met Du Qian. That day, as the academic director, he praised me and introduced me specifically, saying, “Qin Zhenzhen is also a student at the Foreign Languages University, my junior.”
He kept looking at me as he said this, his eyes sparkling, and my face turned red with embarrassment.
Du Qian was a famous talent in the French department of our school, a second-year graduate student, four years my senior, and the object of admiration for countless girls. Because of this connection, we quickly became acquainted. He was like a seed blown into my heart, stubbornly taking root and sprouting even in the scorching summer.
For the first time, I felt my heart stir, and I had a crazy idea: I wanted to pursue him actively.
With the sweetness and shyness of a first love, I tossed and turned in bed at night. Finally, I told myself that once we returned to school, I would confess to Du Qian.
The summer ended quickly, and we both returned to school, maintaining our relationship as friends. But I never confessed to him because I then realized that Du Qian’s hometown friend, Xu Meng, was my classmate. Most of our classmates saw Du Qian and Xu Meng’s relationship as intricate and ambiguous.
Xu Meng was another version of Du Qian, a famous beauty and talented girl in our department since she enrolled.
I didn’t want to know what was going on between them, but I understood that after that summer, Du Qian was becoming more distant from me. Sitting behind Xu Meng in class, I felt a deep sense of inferiority. Compared to Xu Meng, I wasn’t pretty and had no exceptional talent. Du Qian and she seemed so perfect together; how could I come between them?
This clear understanding made my summer sky suddenly turn gray. I only dared to follow them from a distance, secretly watching Du Qian smile and talk to Xu Meng. I only dared to write Du Qian’s name in the snow and then use the warmth of my palm to melt it away. I became even more withdrawn, spending most of my time writing in my diary, burying myself in deep depression. My classmates got used to my silence, not knowing how much pain and despair I felt inside.
Soon, Du Qian graduated. On a sweltering summer night, he invited friends to sing karaoke as he was about to leave school. In the dim corner of the karaoke room, I watched sadly as he and Xu Meng sang love songs together passionately.
That night, we all got drunk, and Xu Meng hummed old songs indistinctly on my shoulder. Du Qian sat across from us, smiling as if he had something to say.
Then, someone played a prank, and the room’s lights and the screen’s light suddenly went out. In my panic, I reached for Xu Meng’s hand but was pulled into a familiar, warm embrace by a gentle hand.
The CD player still played the melody of “Lianlian Fengchen” (Lingering Dust), and suddenly, a light, wet kiss landed on my cheek.
It was Du Qian. He whispered to me, “Silly girl, I’ve always liked you. Promise me you’ll study hard, and when you graduate, I’ll come back for you.”
My heart was pounding so hard it felt like it would burst. The sudden ecstasy overwhelmed me. I shyly and frantically pushed him away, feeling my whole face burn as laughter erupted in the darkness.
Later, when the lights came back on, I saw Du Qian standing in the middle of the room, picking up the microphone. Our eyes met through the crowd, and he smiled mischievously and meaningfully before turning away.
At that moment, Xu Meng walked over to pick up another microphone from the coffee table. I suddenly rushed forward to grab it and started singing loudly along with Du Qian’s voice. I saw Du Qian smile deeply at me while Xu Meng stood there, looking at me in surprise, her expression turning cold and then angry.
In that instant, I felt like a bird chirping. I felt like the ugly duckling that had crossed the fence, no longer shrinking in the withered grass because of Du Qian’s love. I aspired to become a graceful swan. I told myself that even a girl as outstanding as Xu Meng couldn’t win Du Qian’s favor, so I must grow strong wings to be worthy of standing beside him when he came back for me.
Du Qian left school without us exchanging a word about our agreement, and I didn’t even go to the station to see him off. But I knew I had to become extraordinary for him. When I turned into a real swan, I would proudly stand by him and tell him I was beautiful and remarkable because of him.
I didn’t expect Xu Meng to see me as a rival. If it had been before, I would have found competing with her unimaginable, but Du Qian’s words made everything easier. Gradually, every day when I went out, I saw a more vibrant version of myself in the mirror. My classmates couldn’t help but exclaim, “Qin Zhenzhen, you were truly an unpolished gem.”
Facing Xu Meng, I no longer felt inferior. Sometimes she would talk to me about Du Qian, wondering what he saw in me. I would smile and not take it to heart, realizing she was likely feeling the same frustrated jealousy I once did.
Later, she asked if I kept in touch with Du Qian. I honestly told her that besides occasional letters, we both treated this year of separation as a period of growth. We stayed out of each other’s lives with the hope of a better future. He was waiting to see my remarkable transformation, while I was gradually becoming worthy of him.
Xu Meng rolled her eyes and said sarcastically, “You both must be out of your minds.” I couldn’t be bothered to argue, continuing to live and study cheerfully.
As graduation approached, Xu Meng received a scholarship to study in the UK and left school after defending her thesis early. I was recommended for graduate school, waiting for Du Qian like a newly emerged butterfly.
But after that, I never heard from Du Qian again. He disappeared from my life like dew drops into the soil.
Those were lonely days for me. Xu Meng often wrote letters, flaunting her colorful life abroad with a hidden yet apparent tone of gloating. She mocked, “Without Du Qian, you’ll revert to your old self.”
One day, she called to tell me Du Qian had written to her. Her tone was full of triumphant pride and contempt for me. She said she always wondered what Du Qian saw in me.
In the wake of a heavy autumn rain, I cried and then burned all the diaries I had written for Du Qian. I resolved to study hard and live beautifully, so years later, I could make Xu Meng feel ashamed for belittling me and make Du Qian deeply regret giving up on me.
Several years passed quickly. After finishing my studies in Japan, I returned home and became a university teacher.
Spring came unexpectedly, and I received a wedding invitation from Xu Meng, though the groom was not Du Qian.
At her wedding, I saw Du Qian for the first time in years. He still had that bright-eyed, mischievous smile. He gave me a big hug. Overcome with emotion, I couldn’t help but ask why he and Xu Meng didn’t end up together.
He smiled regretfully, saying that on graduation night, he had confessed to Xu Meng in the dark, but she didn’t respond. She was always a proud and independent girl with her own path to follow.
I was so shocked I could hardly speak. Later, I asked Du Qian if he had ever written to me after graduation. Apologetically, he said, “I’m really sorry. Because of Xu Meng, I didn’t want to contact any old friends. Eventually, I lost touch with everyone.” I stood there, tears welling up in my eyes. Among the crowd, I saw Xu Meng in her gown, giving me a proud and cunning smile, vibrant, dazzling, wise, and beautiful.
In that moment, I suddenly understood. In the season of youthful bloom, because of a beautiful misunderstanding, the ugly duckling had become today’s graceful swan.
It was a fairy-tale-like beautiful lie, a secret of one girl teaching another to grow up, our most beautiful memory of youth.
Thank you for reading! ” Sitestorys “
