Stories: The Pain of Youth
The first time I wrote something, it was very immature, just for my own amusement. By the end, I completely lost track of what I was saying…
Yindu High School is still the same, except the old locust tree at the gate has bent down, and the inscriptions on its trunk are a bit blurry. I reach out, gently caressing these words one by one, which have long been engraved in my heart. I lift my head; the sunlight is a bit dazzling, making it hard for me to see the sky and the gazes of the people around me…
Four years ago…
Yindu High School, this was my dream since childhood, a way to leave the past behind. I declined Zhou Wei’s offer of help and walked into the school alone with my luggage. Zhou Wei is my neighbor; we grew up together. His family is relatively wealthy, and he often sneaked delicious food to me, for which he was frequently scolded by his mother. Clearing my thoughts, I found my dormitory. It was a two-person room, and my roommate was Lin Guo, a pretty girl. We quickly became close friends, sharing everything. She told me about the one she loved with her life, Li Xu. He was a gentle boy, but I could tell he wasn’t that innocent.
“Xiao Chu, shall we go eat?” Yes, my name is Xiao Chu.
“Sure, Guoguo, just the two of us?”
“No, let’s bring Li Xu, okay?”
I thought for a moment, tilted my head, and said, “Guoguo, how about we go to a bar?”
“A bar?” Guoguo covered her mouth in surprise. “I’ve never been to one, and it’s not very safe…”
I climbed off the bed, took her hand, and said, “Come on, Guoguo, with Li Xu there, what are you afraid of? We’ve never been, let’s just take a look, okay?” After a moment, she blushed and said, “Okay!”
The Suiyue Bar was always bustling. When we got there, it was already full. The DJ on stage was shouting vulgar songs, and people were screaming like crazy. Occasionally, someone would approach Guoguo. She had been brought up with a proper education and was very uncomfortable in such a place. Her pretty face was filled with unease, and she held Li Xu’s hand tightly. I led them to a private room, which was much quieter. The room was filled with various types of alcohol. I casually mixed three drinks and handed them to them. One drink, and Guoguo was so drunk she couldn’t move, lying on the sofa.
I quietly looked at Li Xu and asked, “Another drink?”
“No, what if I get drunk?” Li Xu smiled, but his smile was no longer innocent; it carried a hint of wickedness.
Next, we embraced and entangled until we were exhausted and lay down. Guoguo was still in a deep sleep, mumbling unconsciously.
Maybe it was because we were too tired the night before, but when I woke up the next day, Guoguo was already gone. Li Xu panicked, jumped up without even dressing properly, and ran out. I sneered, dressed, and returned to school. Zhou Wei was standing under the locust tree at the gate, his face full of worry. Seeing me, his expression turned into one of heartbreak. “Xiao Chu, was it worth it?” I stared at him silently. After a moment, he patted my head, “Xiao Chu, you really make my heart ache…”
“Help me!” I said.
“You know I always will!”
Zhou Wei took my hand and walked to our dormitory. Li Xu was anxiously explaining to Guoguo, “Guoguo, she seduced me, I was drunk…” Before he could finish, Zhou Wei had already rushed over, grabbed Li Xu, and punched him without a word, shouting, “Damn it, how dare you bully my girlfriend!” I cooperated by crying beside him…
“Enough, everyone leave…” Guoguo said. “Xiao Chu, I’m sorry!” She said and then strode out…
That night, I called Guoguo, “Guoguo, let’s go out for dinner. Let the past be the past, okay?” She hesitated for a moment, “Alright, where?” I told her the place.
I walked slowly to the place. From a distance, I heard Guoguo’s screams mixed with the heavy breathing and lewd laughter of men.
When those sounds finally faded, I walked to Guoguo and saw her naked body lying on the ground, trembling. Her eyes showed no hatred, just a blank stare at me, repeatedly asking, “Why? Why? Why?” Her voice was filled with despair. Yes, how could she bear the betrayal of her boyfriend and her best friend, the physical trauma? But it wasn’t enough! I wasn’t satisfied. I found her phone, searched her contacts, and called Lin Yong, “Come over and see your precious daughter!”
When Lin Yong saw me, his eyes widened, “Lin Xiao Chu?”
“You still recognize me as Lin Xiao Chu?”
“Xiao Chu, why did you do this to Guoguo? Are you crazy? She’s your sister!” He said, then walked over to cover Guoguo with his clothes, the tenderness in his eyes deeply hurt me.
“Lin Yong, this is your retribution! Hahaha…” I laughed bitterly.
“Lin Xiao Chu, don’t be shameless!” Lin Yong’s eyes were filled with anger.
“Lin Yong, if it weren’t for you, would I have become like this? You abandoned me and my mom heartlessly. To go to school, I had to start sleeping with different men since I was 14. Is that what a father does? Ignoring his own daughter’s plight!?” Lin Yong took out his phone, and I heard him call the police. But so what? I had nothing left to lose. I closed my eyes and sat on the ground.
“Lin Xiao Chu, you need to know we have no relationship. Your mother got pregnant with you by someone else and wanted me to take the blame. Was I wrong to refuse?”
I was stunned, mumbling, “Impossible, impossible…”
The police sirens were very close…
At that moment, Zhou Wei appeared from nowhere, holding me like when we were kids, saying, “How could I not help you?”
He strode towards the police car…
I sat on the ground, numb…
When I came to, I was back at school, leaning against the locust tree at the gate. I left that city, not thinking about Guoguo’s madness, not thinking about Zhou Wei’s suicide, with only those words on the trunk in my mind – “The Pain of That Time!”
Thank you for reading! ” Sitestorys “
